I'm Having a Nervous Breakdown

Yesterday I really lost it. I think all the whining is really getting to me and the lack of help. I lost my weekly helper about a month or so ago and my mom has been sick so I've been on my own. It was dinner time. I finished cooking a big meal chicken and rice. It was served and put on the table for the triplets to eat. The girls were eating, however, Justin didn't touch his food and was asking for ice cream. I told him, "No, ice cream until you eat your meal." He said, "No, Ice cream!" I again told him, "No, ice cream until you eat your meal." He took his meal and dumped it onto the floor. I got so upset that instead of hitting him (thank God I didn't) I took his plate and smacked it onto the table. Well, it broke shattering plastic all over the kitchen. Luckily no one was hurt.

Anyway I get this e-mail this morning from Ellen. It's a group I belong to about disaplining the triplets. I am also reading tons of books when I have time from the library on this issue. I am doing this alone since my husband is always working. There are days like yesterday that I just can't manage any more. I'm exhausted and to top it off I have another migrane headache. I've been getting them more and more lately. Back to Ellen's comments:

"After the next explosion, I'd try to remember to say to myself:

It's not the end of the world. Anyone can violate his own
standards of behavior- given enough provocation. Don't be so hard
on yourself. No more orgies or self-condemnation. Some of the
guilt you can use- to prod yourself into making changes. The rest,
push away or it will drag you down- paralyze you.

I'll say to myself: 'My temporary breakdown doesn't define me. It
doesn't tell me who I am. I am what I will choose to be- and I'm
not finished yet. I'm still in the process of becoming. What
happened was upsetting- regrettable- but much more important is how
I will conduct myself afterwards.'"